My Life in College: Weird things you can get away with in college

Moral Mildred/Sun Star Columnist
October 9, 2012

Someone once said that college is the only time being both drunk and poor is acceptable. Unless you have plans in getting a degree in being a hobo, this is correct. However, in my opinion, there are a lot more weird things we do in college that would not be acceptable in the real world, besides having no money and still being able to ride the inebriated train. Here are a few:

  1. Sleeping until noon. This one might seem rather obvious, but for most of us it is probably true. Granted weekends in the real world might still allow for sleeping the day away, but a lot of us are going to have to deal with the good ol’ nine to five. For those of you that currently have early morning classes, you are well prepared. As someone who has the majority of her classes in the afternoon, I cannot sympathize and wish you the best of luck.
  2. Showing up to work or class still drunk. In all honestly, I feel like this is never acceptable, but in college it happens. Hopefully not to the majority of us, but I know that we all know that one person that has done it, whether it be a one-time thing or repeat offense. I can not even express the classiness making a mad dash for the bathroom in the middle of class or work to vomit is. Because really, it is just bad form.
  3. Cook food in a coffee maker. I mean actual food, not tea or coffee or some other hot beverage. I know a lot of us have stared at a bag of Top Ramen hungrily, knowing not a single pan or bowl is clean, weighing our hunger against our desire to not do dishes. For those of you that have never used a coffee maker for anything other than making coffee, I have to say, it can make some pretty legitimate instant ramen. Or canned soup. Or cooked veggies.
  4. Looking like a homeless person. I know that we all have what I call homeless people outfits. In fact, I love mine. But if we are all honest with each other, it is probably not the most professional outfit in our wardrobes. Some might argue that it is rather cold in Alaska and wearing 20 layers of sweat pants all tucked into boots is conducive to warmth. Layering is important, however the point of layering is that you can unwrap yourself to reveal the very employed-with-stable-paycheck outfit beneath. It’s like Christmas, for others’ eyes.
  5. Eat with incorrect silverware, if any at all. Lastly, we come to my personal favorite collegiate habit. I have seen food be consumed in the strangest ways, during my studies here at UAF. Recently, I watched someone eat leftover sesame chicken with an ice-cream scoop. We don’t always have the time or desire to wash dishes as college students, so sometimes eating yogurt with a fork or the lid of the yogurt, is just something we have to do.

College is a strange time in a person’s life, where the world doesn’t always make sense and conventional social rules don’t always apply. However, while cooking your instant ramen in a coffee pot and then eating it with a butter knife is called creativity in college, it’s just sad in the real world. Soon a lot of us will be graduating and be forced to act like normal human beings.  But for now, we can still get away with a few bizarre things.

Moral Mildred writes a student life column detailing the ups and downs of living in Fairbanks and attending UAF.

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